“What if I fall? Oh, but my darling, what if you fly?” Erin Hanson
Let’s talk about your fears and why they have so much power over you…
Fear is a projection of the illusions of your mind into your reality. Fear is the limitation your mind sets towards your actions. It is the perfect tool that you mind uses to control you and keeps you in the sweet comfort zone. The mind doesn’t like change and will find any excuse to make you feel the pseudo “safety” by keeping you afraid. If you can just understand that you are NOT your mind, it will be easier to manage and overcome fears. If you don’t control your mind, it will be sure to control YOU.
So how can you overcome your fears?
- Start with making a list of ALL the fears you have. Really define them one by one. You can’t face something you can’t put a finger on. WRITE THEM ALL DOWN.
- Focus on each one individually and ask yourself ‘what’s the obstacle? What’s the monkey mind afraid of?’ Really FEEL your fear by visualizing yourself going through it. Play the worst-case scenario without pausing at the scariest part, and observe your body sensations. Do your shoulders tense up? Do you feel tightness in your neck or back? Do you teeth clench? Do your hands sweat? Really embrace the fear.
- Now write down various solutions and ways you could conquer EACH fear! What would it take to get you to tip over to the other side and conquer it? Try to play it in your head again, but this time come to a SAFE conclusion.
- If the fear is too big, try breaking it down into bite-size manageable pieces, start small and grow the expertise. Reward yourself for trying and give yourself plenty of credit for even the smallest step. Be gentle with yourself. You are doing your best.
- Find the WILL to tip over the edge and JUST DO IT! Once you set your mind on doing it, you might just believe that you CAN!
Remember that it is ALL in your mind. In reality unless there is an immediate physical threat to your body, you will always be safe, the limit is in the mind led by the ego. Conquering fears is very liberating, it gives a sense of great accomplishment, gets you closer to your true self and inspires you to live life fearlessly. Each victory will give you the courage to move on to conquering the next fear, and your courage will grow exponentially. Beliefs CAN be changed but only if you embrace your fear.
So next time you get an opportunity to speak in public, zip line, express your opinion, chat up the guy/girl at a coffee shop GO FOR IT! Slowly but fairly your bite-size fears will grow to become your confidence and all the butterflies in your stomach will fly away.
Yours in becoming fearless,